The First Stump Speech

"Tonight I'm going to talk about knowledge, the knowledge about sex. As We all know if you tell children about sex they will want to do it. In the first 100 days of my administration I will defund any institution that promotes knowledge. Knowledge promotes curiosity. Curiosity creates pregnancies,  pregnancies these institutions will try to end. Look at Russia and see how happy people are over there without knowledge and I bet You they are having a lot less sex too. And it's not because the women over there are ugly... I mean, I have seen and met quite a few Russian women and they are not that bad ....once you get used to them." Behind Big Walter, his staff frantically shuffles papers wondering where this portion of his speech has come from.
     Big Walter continues, "I mean look ...at where they come from..." At that point the mike goes dead and the lights in the auditorium go out. His Staff feels God has taken pity on them and caused the black out.
     From out behind a curtain on the right side of the stage a tall thin figure appears. In a thin nasally voice with a hint of a German accent, "I am Corporal Bannerman, I shut off the power to end this farce. When I am your chief of staff, speeches like that will  not happen. There will be a script and it will be followed.
     Big Walter looks up from his watch, turning to TD "Who the fuck is he? And can someone turn the lights back on I was on a roll there." He barks out a short laugh, "I was given it to the Russians," he laughs again and walks toward his dressing room. "Russian women, god, I love em" speaking to no one. "And I have a few...tough bugger..." The distance and the ever increasing buzz of the crowd drowned out his voice, but he doesn't stop talking.
     Corporal Bannerman looks at Big Walter's staff waiting for something, "Isn't anyone going to shut that asshole up? There are Reporters all over here." The Dozen staff members in unison  move toward the doors Big Walter had just exited. TD stands alone facing Corporal Bannerman.
     "You want a job?" Bannerman smiles.